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Mormon Women Family, Work, and Faith: Deseret News

I was pleased to have my thoughts included in a recent Deseret News article that focused on a few themes I am very interested in: aspirational shame for Mormon women, the wage gap, motherhood, and partnership. Here are some of the ideas that I shared:

How to Identify and Heal From Manipulative Relationships

Manipulation is an extremely broad topic, and it can be difficult to even know where to begin the conversation. To start, a manipulative relationship is one in which an individual seeks to control or use another person; to get him/her to do something or think a certain way by being controlling and dominating.

How to Let Go of Labels: Studio 5

Have you ever noticed how much we label each other? Particularly as women, we tend to put each other in boxes: there’s the Pinterest mom, the Amazon-Prime mom, the athlete mom, the working mom, the stay-at-home mom, and the list goes on. In life, we need to organize things to make sense of them in our brains, but it can be problematic when we try to categorize people as well. Human beings are multi-dimensional, and labels, even positive ones (“the pretty one,” or “the smart one”), can be limiting. Here are some strategies to move beyond this and see each other as really people:

How Expressing Difference Brings Connection

How is differentiation of self related to assertiveness? When a woman asserts herself, she is differentiating her needs, thoughts, feelings, or wants from another person. She is essentially saying, “I’m think something different than you. I have other feelings than you do. I’m not you.” True assertiveness, as I define it, means that this is done in a way that’s not alienating or rude but still clearly makes those differences known.

Empathy: The Secret Sauce of Happy Marriages

As many of us have experienced, even burning love can cool down. By understanding what empathy is and how to demonstrate it in your love relationships, you can heal wounds and create closer bonds.

Ditch The Friend Drama Once And For All!

Sometimes friend drama rears its head in adult girlfriend relationships. If you want to ditch the exaggerated responses and cattiness, developing emotional awareness and healthy communication is the key.

Free Printables: What NOT to Say (and what TO say) to a Loved One Leaving the Church

By Common Consent published my guest blog today about what not to say to a loved one leaving the Church. I’ve had a handful of requests for PDF printables of the lists in the article…so here you go!

What NOT to Say to a Loved One Leaving the Church (Printable PDF Download)

What TO SAY to a Loved One Leaving the Church (Printable PDF Download)

25 Things TO say to a loved one leaving the Faith(1)
25 Things Not to say to a loved one leaving the Faith(2)

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How to Communicate So You’ll Be Heard: Love Rice Podcast

women friends

Are there ways to approach difficult conversations that will make it more likely that we’ll be heard? Absolutely. I talked with Scabs, host of Love Rice podcast about communication strategies and tips form my newest book The Assertiveness Guide for Women. We share some personal stories about difficult conversations we’ve had recently. In this interview I come off more like a chatty girlfriend than a “professional.” It feels like listening in on two girlfriends talking.

Mormon Women, Assertiveness, and Sex: Mormon Sex Info Podcast Interview

I recently chatted with Natasha Helfer Parker, LMFT about how the ability to develop good assertiveness skills can help with sexual satisfaction. We discussed cultural gender messages, both within Mormonism and without, that get in the way of such things as differentiation, communication skills, self-care and self-awareness. I share the 5 skills from my book The Assertiveness Guide for Women that can help shift these patterns around. We also discuss managing libido differences, increasing female arousal and pleasure, sexual education for our teens, how to get past “chastity” language and more.

Listen to the podcast interview here ($1.29)